1. Woo, I’m a dietitian
2. Goodbye student life, hello new car.
3. Right, time to get a job
4. Where are the jobs?
5. Okay cover letter number one. You. Can. Do. This. Fist pump
6. ‘We’d like to offer you an interview’
7. How good is life right now?
8. Okay, interview gold let’s go
9. This. is. so. awkward.
10. Right, what are their values?
11. What can I bring to this role?
12. I’m a country girl. Yep, that will work
13. Oh man, I’m so nervous.
14. That wasn’t so bad.
15. Oh my god, it was actually horrendous. Why did I even say that?
16. Oh well, didn’t actually want to move there anyway. Where would I brunch?
17. ‘Unfortunately, you were unsuccessful this time. We were really impressed with your personality though’
18. Okay, next one. You. Can. Do. This. Fist pump.
19. I need a job
20. There are no jobs
21. Pete Evans is going to stop our jobs.
22. Oh look, the perfect job!
23. Damn, experience
24. Does clinical placement count?
25. So many jobs to apply for
26. Being unemployed is a full time job
27. ‘How’s the job hunt?’
28. It’s Dietitian, not dietition
29. How do I pronounce the managers name?
30. ‘Your application was really good, but we chose someone with more experience’
31. Damn, experience.
32. Yes, same selection criteria. I just got my afternoon back. Fist pump
33. ‘We’d like to offer you a skype interview’
34. Yes, I don’t have to wear pants. What happens if it drops out?
35. Oh man, it dropped out.
36. ‘You nailed the clinical questions, we couldn’t fault you. But we can’t take you’
37. That damn physiology unit
38. It’s okay, not many people have jobs yet
39. ‘Have you got a job yet?’
40. Locum work with potential on going? Sounds fabulous
41. Yay, I have a job. Things will snow ball now. Fist pump.
42. Being a dietitian is so fun.
43. Wow, so many graduate positions to apply for.
44. Summer off & start as a clinical dietitian next year – life is going to be sooooo sweet.
45. Why so many key selection criteria?
46. Just hire me already
47. ‘Have you got a job yet?’
48. Believe me, you’d know. Cue over the top Facebook statuses and super excited snap chats
49. Ugh, why does no one want dietitians?
50. Maybe I’ll just become a housewife
51. ‘What is your five year goal?’
52. Budddddy, let’s not get ahead of ourselves here.
53. ‘Maybe you should consider moving interstate’
54. Oh my god, now this job is made for me
55. Right, heart and soul into this one
56. ‘We’d like you to offer you an interview’
57. Oh my god, yes. Fist pump
58. ‘There will be a short writing task involved’
59. Am I going to have to critique an article?
60. Oh man. Should I call Tim Crowe?
61. That’s it. I’m opening a bakery.
62. Oh no, I know her. What does she have that I don’t?
63. ‘How does this fit within your 5 year goal?’
64. Nailed it. Fist pump.
65. What does she even mean? Can you please repeat the question?
66. Well that felt good. Got this one in the bag
67. One step closer to being the next Susie Burrell
68. Still haven’t called. No, positive thoughts Emma
69. ‘I’m really sorry but you were unsuccessful. You interviewed really well but it came down to experience.’
70. Experience, again.
71. That’s it. I’m buying a one way ticket to the first available destination.
72. ‘Em, you are very employable’
73. Now, this role is made for me
74. How do I address Competent level of patient assessment and treatment?
75. I have my degree. I therefore clearly passed clinical placement, and therefore am clearly competent. Right?
76. Yay another interview
77. How? That was the quickest application I’ve ever done.
78. Right, everything on hold. Must prepare.
79. Why did I apply?
80. Have you read my HECS debt?
81. Okay, no really. Educating individuals and the community about food and nutrition and food is my passion. It’s my jam. The jam to my peanut butter.
82. Referee is on holidays. Didn’t put mobile on resume. Emma, why!
83. Remember to tell interviewee mobile number.
84. Potential husband in Woolworths. Good start
85. ‘Tell me about a time you made a mistake and what would you do now looking back?’
86. ‘Well I forgot to book an interpreter.’
87. Oh no, does that demonstrate poor organisational skills?
88. I hope not, I’m not. I have four to do lists, a daily planner, a weekly planner and an a monthly planner to prove it.
89. ‘We don’t really use interpreters.’
90. Phew, did that just work in my favour?
91. Damn it, forgot to give her mobile number
92. Oh my god, what happens if this is the deal breaker?
93. I feel like everyone else has job
94. I want different things though
95. The next bunch of graduates will be out soon.
96. ‘I have the pleasure of offering you the position.’
97. I have never been so happy in my life
98. But it’s only part time
99. It’s a start

We go to university to learn the nitty gritty. The what and the why and the how to be a dietitian. It’s the real life that really tests you. It’s outside of the textbook and in the clinical environment and in the job search. They are challenging times but the way you approach and deal with it can really attest to your resilience, optimism and motivation.

So first of all, before you drive out of university and feel relieved at never having to find a car spot at Deakin again, accept that you will be applying for the same jobs as your friends. It really sucks, but that’s what going to happen. You think the same. You all share a passion for delicious food, nutrition and helping others. And you know that they’ll rally with you when a celebrity chef decides to take on the nutrition world. You’ve been through a heck of a lot together and this is just another challenge in your dietetics pursuit. Be happy, support them and don’t you dare let the job game ruin those wonderful friendships. Some of my best friends are Dietitians. I’m rooting for them, and they’re rooting for me. And within the past three weeks, myself and two of the besties gained positions. Good things do in fact come in threes.

There will be days when you want to become a housewife and bake cakes. You may have started planning a café menu and considered staffing, or even started a Melbourne-version of a famous board game. But remember, you are made for this. You’ve worked your butt off & you know what you’re doing. You deserve this, so believe in yourself. It will take time, but you will get a job. Casual, contract, part time, full time. It may not be your dream job but all roads lead to somewhere.

But most importantly, stay positive and have fun. Laugh with your fellow grad about those wonderful puns & memes.

Get excited about the simple things. Enjoy the break from study and spend the time catching up with your friends and family. Go out for brunch, host a dinner party, volunteer, line up for hours for that restaurant you’ve had wish listed on Urbanspoon for your entire degree, go on a day trip, go out for brunch again. Do anything that makes you remotely happy. Just don’t spend all your time scrolling through job boards and writing cover letters. Otherwise you’ll go crazy, and the nutrition world is crazy enough.

Emma Stubbs, Community Dietitian (part time). Fist pump. xo